Willpower: Where do I get it? Is there an app for that?

I read self help books.  I love Oprah and Dr. Phil.  I know that its cheesy and corny, but I realized long ago that human emotion and struggle is universal and someone out there has probably already gone through it so I should just listen to them.
Yesterday Dr. Phil said the difference between a goal and a dream was that a goal has a date and a plan.  So yesterday I made two goals, two dates, and two plans...wrote them down and everything and decided to stick to them.
Last night I was talking to an old friend and she said something that broke my heart. 
"Is it too late for me?"
She's 29 btw.  And of course its never too late to start making changes.  And that's all this really is, little changes and choices that add up to results.

So back to willpower.  I was thinking about it.  How much do you need to be successful at anything? How much discipline to make your dream a reality? I don't really know.  I know I feel like I don't have a lot of it.  But there is a difference between getting up everyday and battling yourself all the time to do the right thing and stressing over eating a piece of candy and beating yourself up over a french fry, and just writing out a game plan and doing it.  That doesn't seem so hard now does it?  Here are some steps to building willpower I have found really work for me and maybe they will for you too not just in diet and exercise but life as well:
1. STOP HATING YOURSELF
       If you stand in front of the mirror everyday and hate what you see you are off to a bad start.  Why do you hate yourself so much? You did it.  Its your fault.  But you can also fix it.  And that is empowering, not deprecating.  Look at yourself and don't hate it, but say out loud what you want to change.  There are so many things in this world I hate and probably can't do a damn thing about, but when it comes to ANYTHING about myself, well I can change that, probably almost immediately.  Standing there hating yourself is a waste of time.  If you don't like something say you don't, then say what you're going to do about it.  The chains that bind you are the ones you've made yourself, so break them and fix that shit.

2. ITS REALLY NOT THAT HARD
    We are not battling the forces of darkness or trying to get the ring to rule them all back to Mordor.  You are just not eating crap and getting off your ass and doing something.  Its not hard.  Quit telling yourself it is and that you will fail.  Its not a quest for the missing grail, its just food.  Just because you failed before doesn't mean you will this time.  You can do it.  You WILL do it.  You are just following the plan.  Get down off the cross and do some lunges.

3. STOP FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF
    So you are unhappy? Join the club.  But you are not different, and the millions of people who have come before you have done it so why can't you? You're not too old, you're not too fat, you DO have enough time, and you have the strength to do it because see #2 ITS NOT THAT HARD!

4.  STOP MAKING EXCUSES
     No one cares that you're fat.  It doesn't bother the rest of the world.  It keeps on turning right around doesn't it? So your excuses are only hurting you.  And you will pay the price, no one else.  So stop making them.  You're wasting time.  All that time you spend making an excuse you could have been making a solution.  Sit down and make the goal, make the date, and make the plan.

5. CONGRATULATE YOURSELF
    You are not a lazy piece of shit who can't do anything.  You are a person on a mission.  And everyday and every second that you get closer to the goal you need to praise yourself.  Tell yourself you did it and you are going to do it again.  Look in the mirror and say today I may not like what I see so today I'm going to change it.  Today I will be better than I was yesterday.  I will be better in the next minute than I was a minute ago.  Pump yourself up.  Rocky IV soundtrack will do the trick.

6. DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP
    Rome wasn't built in a day.  And your fat ass isn't going to be smaller in a week.  And if you slip up don't beat yourself up over it.  Move on.  No pity parties here.  Pity parties are not fun for anyone and the food and music are terrible.  Just keep going.  For every mistake do two good things to make up for it.  Ferrero Roche? An extra 2 min on the treadmill and 15 extra pushups.  Then smile and pat yourself on the back because you are doing it!

7.  DONT HATE YOUR WORKOUT
     If you don't want to get up at 5 am and do lunges then don't.  Find something you like to do.  Got kids? Go play with them.  Got a dog? Go walk it.  Park farthest from the door at kroger and walk.  You should feel blessed you can even do that.  Some people can't. The point is do something.  20 mins people.  20 min of MODERATE activity 4-5 times a week will do wonders.  You don't have to kill yourself.  But some days you might have the urge..and when you do take it and run with it.

I suggest you sit down right now, write your goal down in big fun letters.  Then write down your date.  Then make a plan for each week that brings you closer toward that goal.  And banish all negativity from your life.  Don't do ANYTHING that isn't pushing you towards that goal.  Its not that hard. 

Secret Confessions- I'm a Food Addict

Today as I was eating my kosher bun-less hotdog during our restaurant's family meal, one of the cooks looked at me and said
"No bun?? You need carbs for energy, did you know Dr. Atkins died at 55?"
I said "bread and pasta are slow burning and actually provide no energy, that's why I'm eating asparagus and eggplant because those are actual energy carbs" 
She looked at me bewildered, I further explained I get my carbs and subsequent energy from fruits and veggies.  She replied, " I had no idea fruits and veggies were carbs"

Yet she knew that Dr. Atkins died at age 55.  This is what scares me.  This is what keeps me up at night.  This and standing behind the obese woman in kroger with her obese child and her cart filled with horrendous food, thinking that her whole grain bread is better than white bread.  It's not only a lack of education its a a product of the industry flat out lying to people and its freaking sad.

Do you want to know what's more sad than that?  The fact that I have the knowledge (however little it may be) and I still eat horrible foods.  Why? I'm a food addict.  And even more specific I'm a "moment" addict.  Which is even more frightening in terms of life choices.

I'm an impulse addict.  And it has never seemed like such a problem until I gained 80lbs.  And I think I've learned that it is not isolated to just food.  It crosses every single aspect of my life.  It controls me and it causes me to make poor decisions despite having all the necessary knowledge to change.  And that makes me worse off than the fat ladies at Kroger: I know better...

So as I go along my journey and realize that it is not just about the food I eat but how and why I eat and how each day exercising a little bit of control of impulse in every part of my everyday decision making I can gain the practice and discipline to transfer over to my diet and my exercise.

And just for the record let me just say one more time that grains are not good for you in any way whatsoever.  No they don't have fiber that you can even use.  They are sugar.  Period.  Whew..

Let me also say that today I stared at a plate of brownies while eating asparagus and I think it made it a little easier...

What. The. Hell.

No weights, no paleo makes Julie a fatty patty.

So I got a new job as a manager at a restaurant/brewery.  And let's just say it's been going really well except for the beer and bread... and not working out.  Now it's all catching up to me and those jeans that used to fall off all the sudden are staying on.  More importantly I don't feel great... and by not great I mean I feel horrible.

Because I made my 30 days of paleo a novelty and gave myself a month long pat on the back where I was so proud of myself that I decided eating EVERYTHING and not working out was the best reward ever... I have lost some serious ground.  But don't worry you guys, I have good news.

I'm back... starting today I'm doing another 30 days of paleo, but not just for you this time, for me.  I have discovered something amazing about myself recently... I have a ridiculous amount of willpower.  4 weeks ago I decided I wouldn't bite my nails anymore.  I bit my nails for 28 years and tried everything to quit.... everything except actually just quitting... like just saying you know what I'm not going to do this anymore... and yesterday I cut my fingernails for the first time ever.  It seems like a small thing but it proved something to me... I don't need gimmicks or accountability.  I don't need motivation or a support buddy to call when I'm about to cheat.  I have everything inside me to be successful... I just need to do it... and let nothing get in my way and no excuses overtake my willpower..

I also realize the people around me who are struggling with the exact things I always talk about and have told everyone a million times... I want to reach the people I love and somehow show them how paleo can change their life if they just commit and let them know they can do it.  I have found in my life as a trainer or a leader that you cannot make people do anything.... you can only do it... and let them see your success and then let them find their way... so here we go again.

Btw I will also be starting CrossFit again (thank god) at CrossFit East Decatur and I can't wait to start bitching about how sore and strong I am...

Back on the horse! Let's talk substitutions

Ok, so I royally messed up but now I'm back on the paleo horse... working out... eating delicious clean foods... and getting back on track. YAY!  I've also started writing for frugivoremag.com in an attempt to spread my paleo seed all over the planet! (as gross as that sounds)

Today I thought I'd talk a little about substitutions.  Everywhere I look I see it.  Paleo banana bread, paleo cookies, paleo ice cream, paleo pizzas, paleo beer... just kidding about the last one (p.s. hate to burst your bubble but gluten free is not paleo, it's made with buckwheat and a special brewers yeast... still grains).  And I think it's funny because the whole point of paleo is to be eating what our ancestors ate and I seriously doubt they were eating paleo cookies... seriously doubt it.

I hear your argument... I can hear it in my head right now... "but it's better than actual cookies."  Hmm, is it? How so?  I'd be curious to hear how you justify it.  Because there isn't any gluten or wheat or dairy or soy and it falls under all the "rules" of paleo?  Right, yeah.  But what is the point of paleo?  Let's talk about sugar.

If you are at your goal weight... and you're no longer addicted to sugar... and you cheat maybe once a month... and you can deadlift exactly what you want and you are supplement and disease free.. I see no issue with substitutions.  But if you're trying to lose weight and kick the sugar, then no substitutions.  NO SUBSTITUTIONS.

I'm not saying you can't do it at all but I can say in my 30 days the only two subs I had were coconut milk and almond butter.  The point is to kick the sugar and carb addiction and if you're eating a bowl of "paleo" ice cream every night chances are you aren't doing that.  Not to mention you are setting yourself up to cheat.  If you're a first timer to paleo I recommend staying away from the subs until you're more advanced.  Like until you know you can control it.  I had this trainer named Corey who was a badass and she would buy a brownie... it would literally take her an entire month to eat it.  She had self-control like I've never seen.  I learned the one bite and let it go method from watching her.  Like after a night of drinking a fifth of vodka we got hotdogs and Corey still ate hers without a bun (although I argue that because I threw my hotdog up out of a moving cab that mine didn't count either).  But we are talking about someone who had been doing this a long time.  Subs are dangerous for first timers.  Subs can lead to cheats.  You need to just get it in your head that food is fuel right now and you need to eat only what you need because for your whole life you were eating what you wanted.  That's why you're fat and disgusting.  So stop it.

Yep...I messed it ALL up...

Ugh the entire 30 days of straight Paleo almost a complete waste...yep that's right because I followed it up with almost 30 days of complete crap..and not working out on top of it...and so what happened you asked? I am not sleeping well..I've gotten a little fatter, slower, more bitchy and less positive.  Tomorrow I turn 28 and I ask myself how far am I really from where I was 3 years ago?  Because there are fundamental psychological things that I still have yet to change...

1. I am bad with money

This is a lesson I am learning the hard way.  It is also my #1 excuse for when I cheat.  It is cheaper and more available to go to wendy's.  Plus its still delicious to me and probably always will be.  Then I get in a cycle..and I can't get out.  The truth is paleo is not my budget problem and when I sat down and actually looked at my finances and then went to the store and started shopping smarter I can manage.  Duh.  Yeah almond meal is $12 a pound.  But chicken and veggies? Super cheap.  Knocking out the substitutions is the best thing I ever did.

2. I love instant gratification

If it looks delicious and I'm not be held hostage by a 30 day paleo promise? I WILL eat it..and eat a lot of it. Its something I've dealt with my whole life.  I am always afraid if I don't partake in something I'll be missing out.  It also believe it or not has a direct impact on #1..jeez go figure all of this stuff is related.

3. I don't have time

Recently my boss did an exercise in time management.  It truly was amazing.  There are 168 hours in a week. Go through you're actual schedule including everything you can think of and I promise you, you will have at least 2 hours left over to make your food.  The killer? Get up an hour earlier to workout/prepare for the day and see what happens.

These are really the biggest problems for me and I have been avoiding them for a while.  Now I'm tackling them head on.  I am tired of failing or succeeding and then failing.  Its time to make some serious changes for myself.  I am back on paleo and I'm also working on intermittent fasting ie. eating all my calories for the day in a 7 hour period.  I'll let you know how it goes.  Tomorrow when I turn 28 (i'm stopping counting after this one by the way)  I will no without a doubt that I'm better off than I was because I have the knowledge and the tools to be successful.  I have realized where my weaknesses lie and now I'm ready to destroy them!  Come on! It'll be fun...

Yes I'm awful and the worst blogger in history....but here it is

I realize that I finished my 30 days of Paleo almost 30 days ago.  Like I get it and you all have been waiting on pins and needles I'm sure.  To be honest with you I have been doing not such a great job since then.  I have been eating ridiculous nonsense, not working out, and being a total loser.  There are several reasons (excuses) for this.
1. I work literally like 75 hours a week and barely have time to grocery shop much less cook my food.  I could get up early and do it and work out but I struggle to wake up early because my diet is so bad and I haven't been sleeping well.  Yep, duh.

2.  I have been super broke adjusting to just working one job and I'm not kidding when I say I have had to eat on $20 for an entire week.  Yep, michaelina's lean meals are .88.  Judge away trust me I am paying the price. 

Because of my weakness as a human being and my horrible decisions I am feeling it this week.  I feel horrible, I actually have allergies, and ps right after I went off Paleo I got a horrible stomach virus and threw up for 2 days straight.  I know.. duh.

All this has shown me is of course it works but obviously you have to stick with it.  And trust me my little babies I am getting back on the horse.  Hopefully this shows you that I am not perfect, I do trip up, and I pay the price.  But don't worry...as long as you get back on it you can reverse the damage.  The problem is sticking to it when life gets in the way.  duh.

So here are my pictures.  No video because I couldn't get my imovie to do anything.  But at least you can see that I actually have done something.  These are from before I EVER started paleo to now.  Here's the proof folks.

I'm a slacker and a horrible human being..

I have been so busy with shit lately I realized I haven't even done my update for the end of my 30 days...Trust me I am working on it.  I'm doing a video blog with all my pictures and stuff and me sort of telling my story...I hope you all enjoy it just takes a little time.  Please bare with me as being awesome is not something you can rush:)  Also in other news..Paleo did change my life..in more ways than one.  Hopefully one day I will share the complete extent of it with you all.  But at this time just know I feel awesome, I look more and more awesome every day, and my life is awesome:)

Thanks for all your support and I promise it will be up soon!

Mom told me to update my blog...soooo...

I realize I haven't talked you in a while...keep in mind (Mom) I work two jobs and I also have a pretty active social life (with my cats)...

But yes I am still Paleo..and honestly seriously debating whether or not I should even cheat on Tuesday.  But the weekend I'm definitely planning on cheating...a lot..

I have also decided for my 30 day blog I will do a video blog just as something more fun and visual..its also the day I will be posting basically pictures of myself in my underwear...on the internet..for everyone to see.  My friend recently told me I have balls to do that...I hope my balls can inspire your balls to drop...you're welcome (sorry mom)

So the first week was super hard...and the second week was easier...but honestly at this point its not even a diet.  Its just the way I eat.  My mom and I and my sweet grandmother went to brunch last sunday and obviously they got tons of delicious bread and sugar and french toast and I got bacon and eggs.  Its to the point now where I can't cheat because I would let myself down so much.  Wow only 3 1/2 and I actually love myself more.  I care enough about myself to do the right thing.  I don't know that I have ever felt that way.  Self-loathing is such a comfortable familiar state for me.  Its where I have been for a while..but with the pounds I have been shedding I have obviously also shed my self-hatred and my dishonesty with myself.

Tegan and Sara have an amazing song called "Dark Come Soon"...Tegan says a line that goes "everything I say, I say to me first"  "So what I lied, I lie to me too".

I love this song because it talks about how we lie to ourselves first.  Which is what I had to over come. 
"one bite won't hurt", "I can make up for it later", " I ran a mile today I can have some cake."  Um yes it will, no you won't.

Then you get to the bottom of the spiral and you hate yourself so much nothing can pull you out.  And you're fat, and you can't even let the people around you love you because you don't love yourself..you don't even like yourself.  Why would you? You're a fat slob with no will power and no hope.
Wrong.

Its a choice.  A series of choices.  Make the right ones and you will feel rewarded.  Its not "I need to lose 20lbs". Its gotta be "just say no to that sandwhich".  Baby steps.  Small changes.  Don't freak out.  Just calm down.  Lunge toward the light.

WTF Peanut M&Ms, V-Day Treats, and an accidental cheese incident

So today is day 15 of my all paleo diet and I have to say one thing I have learned in the last two weeks is that preparation is totally key..otherwise you might slip up and accidentally eat some cheese.

I have been doing super well although probably not eating enough since I have been really busy with work and all thats.

So last night I worked at the restaurant and of course there were freaking v-day cupcakes.  Golden yellow with delicious pink frosting, and almond hershey kisses which are infinitely better than regular kisses (at least right now).  And a GIANT bag of peanut M&Ms which is funny because I was just talking to my friend about them and how they were definitely a factor in my cheat meal.  BUT I resisted all of it.  I know my goals and I know what I want to do and if I want a smoking hot beach bod there's no room in my life for nonsense.  But then there was the pizza....

Exhibit A: look how close they were to me all night!

So at my restaurant they have gluten free pizza which is awesome because I was starving last night.  So I told them to make me a gluten free with chicken, spinach, mushrooms, tomatoes, basil, and a sprinkle of goat cheese (you can have that in moderation).  Well all of our pizzas come with fontina, parmesan, and white cheddar.  They didn't know I only wanted goat cheese.  So they made this beautiful pizza (all ingredients on top so I couldn't see the cheese) that I tore up in like 5 sec.  About the second piece in I realized it had cheese on it.  Suffice to say I still ate THE HELL out of it.  Hey you have to pick your battles.  And our cheese in not processed and all organic so whateves I did what I had to do.  No M&Ms and cupcakes and kisses warrants a little forgiveness.

So today's lesson kids is to PREPARE so you don't get stuck accidentally eating cheese or something worse like bread.  You got this.

Life gets in the way...

So I haven't posted EVERY day like I should because I have been distracted by work, and working out, and well, other pleasant distractions:)

Look lets just say my blog has blown up to epic status and it is super hard to keep all my readers (fans) in the know constantly.  I've gotten a lot of attention on Paleo and CrossFit and of course myself which according to some people "I love attention".  And I dooooo!!!

So now that its totally working and people can actually see my results, all the haters are coming out of the woodwork and trying to figure this thing out.  You all know what Paleo is sort of, lean meats, fruits, nuts, veggies, seeds.  No legumes/soy/wheat/gluten/dairy/sugar.  But I am getting a couple really specific questions that I should probably address.

1. How many times a day do I eat?
The answer to this question varies.  Honestly usually only 3 or 4 which might blow some people's minds who hear you have to eat 6 small meals a day to keep your metabolism going.  So I can burn calories? Well because I'm eating clean I really on take in around 1500 a day and my body needs 1600 (I actually had that tested) just to function.  Add even one work out on top of that and I am burning almost as much as I take in.  I have almost no fat save almond butter, coconut milk, canola oil or fish oil which are all high in Omega 3s which is good fat that my body needs anyways.  I literally only eat when I'm hungry.  Not when I'm bored or emotional or anything like that.  Just when I'm hungry.  You'd be surprised how many times a day you are actually hungry. 

I DO NOT recommend you do exactly what I do.  I advise you go get your body fat/bmi/fat lbs tests done and start from there.  If it says you need 1700 calories to survive then you should be right at that and exercising for fat lose.  If you don't have fat to lose and you're working out then you might need to be around 2000.  I know CrossFit guys with 0 fat who take in around 3000.  But you have to play with it.  Do some research and find out what works for you.  Eating when you're not hungry doesn't make any sense to me.  Eat when you're hungry. Stop when you're full.  Duh,

2. Do you take any supplements?
I take 1000mg of vitamin D, a super B12 complex, and 6-8 capsules of fish oil a day.  That's it.  Women past the age of 25 tend to be deficient in Vitamin D which often you can find in milk or outside but right now since its balls ass freezing and I don't do dairy I take a supplement.  The benefits of a super B12 complex are amazing.  All of us ladies need that shit around our monthly times because we become deficient crazy vitamin B starved bitches and will literally start killing people.  And don't get me started on the benefits of fish oil.  Its just awesome.  Make sure you get one that's been purified of mercury and all the other disgusting shit we have done to the poor fishies.

Um that's not protein.  Its roids and he looks absolutely ridiculous.  How does he wipe his ass??

Protein shakes are ridiculous! RIDICULOUS! Stay away from them at all costs!  Look at the ingredients.  If it says "proprietary blend" of ANYTHING put it down and back away slowly.  Quick movements might disturb the juice heads and make them pounce!

If you're trying to lose weight liquid nutrition is a bad way to go period.  And I hate to tell you this but if you are trying to get bigger than you are protein is not going to do it.  You need to lift and lift heavy.  And even then you will NEVER get big if its not in your DNA or your body type.  So stop trying.  All you're doing is giving yourself diabetes and cancer.  And that does not look good even with a hot beach bod.

Hope you enjoyed!  I cannot wait to put up my before and after pictures because ya'll are going to lose your shit!! Till next time.....

Ok so I messed up a little....

Weekends are tough...I had a really close call on Saturday because I gave blood and I hadn't really eaten and all they had was nutter butters and cookies.  Luckily the vitamin shoppe saved me with a gluten/soy/dairy free almond coconut bar.
Lets talk about Saturday night.....

My best friend of like my whole life who I haven't seen in a couple years just had a break up and he wanted to hang out.  So I had a half a glass of wine with him.  Which went against my own personal goal of not drinking for 30 days but not really against paleo.  We were going to eat dinner at a paleo restaurant but the wait was like 45 min long so we went to this other place that was totally not paleo.  I had to improvise on the fly being that it was a mexican restaurant.  So I got a steak taco with a corn tortilla instead of flour and a buffalo grilled chicken taco.  Not the best and possibly not gluten free but hey no cheese and no flour so I did my best.  We did get margaritas.  I don't think tequila is paleo but they were skinny margaritas so that was paleo.  Just 1800, agave nectar, lime juice.  So I avoided all the processed stuff there too!

On sunday morning we had brunch at the paleo restaurant and it was awesome!!!!  I had a paleo frittata and paleo blueberry pancakes (almond meal).  It was delicious and all paleo.


The point is while I don't think technically I was 100% paleo I could definitely get pretty darn close if I needed to.  And I think the most important part is that you improvise with each situation.  You just decide what you can and can't do and go for it.  Preparation is best but sometimes improvisation is necessary.  Oh yeah..I lost 6 lbs this week and my body fat went down 2%.  Of course I didn't get to work out like I wanted to but that is about to change.  I think I've got the diet down and my next goal is at least 4 days of workouts a week.  I will obviously keep you guys posted!!

Wow people actually read this? Guess I should start posting some science..

So my  blog is like blowing up and I'm pretty sure in two years there is going to be a movie made about a fat girl who does paleo and gets hot and has all of her friends do them same and then starts a worldwide revolution.  Just as long as its a musical I will sign off on it.

(thinking about getting one of these for my office)

I decided to put a great article by Whole 9Life on here about why paleoans? don't eat grains or soy or dairy.  I get asked that a lot and I try to explain it but I'm not great at the science and someone else has already done it in amazing easy to understand terms.  Among my usual suspects of paleo questions, Whole9Life is one of the BEST resources for paleo and ridiculous workouts that will make you have a rocking body and ultimately make you a better person.  Like my blog.  Here is a link to the article about why even whole grains are a no no.

http://whole9life.com/2010/03/the-grain-manifesto/

I was also talking to my nutritionist yesterday (the one that works here not my personal one) and we were discussing how different people respond to diet.  I told her I had to go all out (30 days strict of paleo) and she said she would never start a person off like that.  At first I was like why not?? And then I realized she is totally right.  These 30 days have been two years in the making for me!  When I started CrossFit I didn't change my diet until 8 months in.  And I did Zone for 2 months! Yikes!  Then I found the most amazing woman, Corey, and she changed my life (apparently she like does that).  Aside from drunk eating hot dogs without the bun(which I was just amazed by) she introduced me to Paleo and I did roughly 5 or 6 days on with one or two cheat days.  I have lost 50lbs in 2 years ps.  I will post pics at the end of this month because they are kind of awesome.  So I am doing this hardcore thing after 2 years of playing with this diet.  So if you can't go all out its ok shhhh..there there...  Cutting out bread and dairy was one of the hardest things I have ever done.  And so now I am just taking it a couple steps further with all added sugar and alcohol.  So take baby steps or go all out but whatever you do just change and do it now!!! 

And also let me say thank you for reading.  I have struggled with weight for almost 10 years and I know the battle well.  If you ever need anything just private message me or for those of you with my number give me a call.  Maybe we can meet up for some wheat grass shots or something?  Possibly a coconut milk pina colada? Maybe just a lunge party...

Ok Vegetarians...I am pretty damn tired of your nonsense...

Two blogs in one day What!? I have that much energy and I was pissed off by yet another vegetarian.  So yeah I'm doing it.

First of all your diet is your choice.  Just like your beliefs are your choice.  But have the science to back it up.  Want my paleo science?? robbwolf.com thepaleodiet.com marksdailyapple.com...there's your effin science...its all there in black and white...

So vegetarians decide to be this way for a few reasons but the biggest ones seem to be health (laugh) or spiritual(don't kill the animals waa waaa:(

Let's address the first:
Being a veg is not healthy, it requires to find alternate forms of protein in dairy (bad), soy (really bad), and legumes(horrible).  Why are these things bad? First of we are the ONLY animal that continues to consume milk after we are babies.  And furthermore from an alternate source (cows).  NEWS FLASH! Cows don't even drink cow milk.  Not to mention the homoginizicpasturiffic process milk has to go through to be safe to drink...um why? I don't even want to know.  And let's hope that milk your drinking or cheese your eating or whatever doesn't come from cows with bovine growth hormone, otherwise enjoy your cancer.
You don't get me started on soy and legumes.  Just go to marksdailyapple.com or robbwolf.com and search them.  It will all be there.

Oh yeah dairy=gluten=cancer...enjoy your healthy lifestyle!

Think us meat eaters are being meanie heads to animals? How many field mice/birds/bugs/spiders(kill em all I say but still) do you think those big machines kill in order to harvest your delicious greens??? Is a cows life more important than a field mouse? OH you don't have an answer...no you don't.

"but I harvest ALL the vegetables I eat from my giant veg garden in my backyard" um no you don't and you still have to use pesticides and fertilizers to grow what you need to survive.  You are still killing insects.  But once again whose life is more important?

Whew! Ok....if you have anything else to say about this walk over and look into the mirror with a big smile...see those canine teeth?? specifically made for ripping the flesh of tasty animals apart and swallowing....you guys got me all worked up...i'm going to have a rare steak with a side of bacon.

I'm going to get smacked in the face today....

I can already tell you I am because MY ENERGY IS THROUGH THE ROOF!!!!!  I feel like I'm on ten energy drinks but without the rapid heart rate and other horrible shit...I woke up this morning and this is what happened:

A. Energy was on a 10!!! no a 15!!!! see what I meann ahhhh.....
B. Fat that used to hang over jeans mysteriously gone..abs are surfacing
C. Kickass workout
D. Cleaned house!
E. Rocked my face off!!!!!

I knew if I could get to day 4 I would be set and here I am rocking out!  Even my workout felt easier (though it was an ass-buster courtesy of CJ at Invictus) but I definitely felt strong and pushed myself further.  Although my torn PCL is still seriously inhibiting me (no squats :() I got on the tread today and did 3 sets of .25 at 7.0 with the last set at 7.5.  Its supposed to be 9 but shit I have a torn ligament so I thought it was pretty good! 

Also my gorgeous, intelligent, and all around amazing lady friend is visiting tonight so I'm super jazzed about that!

Right now life is awesome!  I did have a pretty gnarly sugar craving last night around 9:30 when I got home.  I mean I had a snack attack but I just drank about 1/2oz of coconut milk and it satiated me long enough to get in my pjs, hop into bed and complete My So-Called Life marathon.  Damn that Jordan Catalano is fine!

Do Paleo. Feel Better. Look Better. Duh.

I've got some fish oil in my pocket and the other hand is eating a lettuce wrap!

No seriously I have fish oil in my pocket.  I have been taking it for sometime but only two capsules a day.  After using the handy dandy fish oil calculator at whole9life yesterday I realized I needed to up my dosage to 6 a day!

So day 2 is over and done and I made it jusssst fine I tell ya.  I also contacted an old friend of mine..here's a pic of him:

A spoonful of this and an ounce of coconut milk and you have an epic snack!!!

I feel like I'm in the nutritional dark ages.  I mean they ordered pizza from pizza hut yesterday for lunch at my work.  I used to have a meltdown if someone brought Diet Coke to Razor's Edge (See Rivers Powers for all my diet coke meltdown recaps).

Because I work at a gym I am constantly hearing skinny people talk about not worrying about their diet because they work out and they are skinny...
DIET IS NOT ABOUT WEIGHT LOSS!!!
Now this goes against everything we have been told (see Jillian Michaels, try  not to vomit). But guess what? What you've been told is all a lie...(see George Orwell's 1984, or "Solyent Green")

Just because you have a great body and you're 28 years old and you work out like a maniac does not mean eating oatmeal everyday and protein shakes can't give you type 2 diabetes.  Our bodies are machines and even if it looks good on the outside there is a lot of stuff going on inside that you can't see.  But you can feel.  That's why people like Eva T and Shana Alverson (who look awesome) still Paleo.  Because Cancer is a bummer and so is alzheimer's, diabetes, heart disease, chronic arthritis, allergies, acne, old age...etc....blah blah blah (does paleo help these things..why yes, yes it does)

Can skinny people get all that's listed above?? Why yes, yes they can.  So its not always about weight loss..think..preventative care.  So avoid all the processed crap, and don't EVER eat anything called Soylent Green....(it's people).

Sugar is the devil..and spaghetti squash is God's gift to me...

Ok so day 1 is over and here's what I discovered...

1. I am so addicted to sugar
2. I did not pack enough food
3. I am so lucky to have decided to start paleo the same day I started my period
4. This  is going to be tough.


 This is Eva T.  She does Paleo.

So I definitely had withdraws last night from caffeine and sugar.  The fatigue set in around 7:30 and by 8 I was out of it.   I slept really well though and besides some cramps I woke up feeling pretty good this morning.  I knew the first 3 days would be the toughest..but whateves I need it!!!

So I was on the phone with my gorgeous significant other (who does not have to worry about such things as losing weight because she's perfect:)) and she was concerned about me setting myself up for failure.  That maybe I should start smaller like just giving up beer for 30 days. She makes a good point.  Most diet plans say to start small and don't set yourself up for failure.  But here is my trick: I am taking it one day at a time.  Today isn't day 2 of 30, its just tuesday.  I have been through a million tuesdays and I will go through a million more.  Its just tuesday and I GOT THIS!  My food is prepared so I have no excuse other than I know I will want sugar so bad in a few hours I might kill someone for a stick of gum.  But I can do it.  Not worrying about tomorrow or yesterday but today.  Just get through Tuesday.

I am also really proud of myself for making it through yesterday because I have to say it was so hard!  I am so used to getting off work, going home and having some wine or beer and maybe  a little treat!  I had to fight it.  My best help is this blog and knowing I am accountable to 3 people and my mom.  But hey, that's something.  I won't let you guys down!


Here's how to make spaghetti squash the best thing in the world!!!!:


Buy one
Cut it in half
Put the oven on 425
Clean out the seeds and pulp
Lay it down on a baking sheet (rind side up)
Bake for 40 min but watch it so you don't burn it
It looks like spaghetti and taste delicious!!!!!  Use it as a sub for pastay.  Its filling and totally good for you!! I have some with chicken packed for today!  It only costs 2.47 and it gave me enough for like 4 days!!! Get ONE NOWWWWW!!!

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single salad....

So today I start the 30 day paleo challenge.  I find it kind of strange that I have never done it...some people might be surprised to hear that.  I am surprised to say it considering for the last two years I have been nagging EVERYONE about how important paleo is and how its the only way to eat.  So why am I such a lousy hypocrite??  The answer: I don't really know..but I have a few theories...

Why is it so hard to eat clean?  All it really takes is a moderate amount of effort and will power.  I stress moderate because really why is it so hard to say no to bad food and alcohol ESPECIALLY when we know it can increase our quality of life, prevent chronic illness, and make us skinny and hot.  Why is it that we can kill ourselves in the gym, put all our heart and effort into our work/family/friends/significant other..but not into our diet which really when you think about it is just our own well-being.  Why do we neglect ourselves?

One really big reason is we are physically addicted to sugar.  I mean everyone is.  If you have ever had a bowl of pasta and or a doughnut or both together at the same time (my hand is raised high), then you are probably addicted to sugar.  And being addicted physically can feel nearly impossible to overcome (see my 6 years of smoking. gross btw)  But it really only takes about a week to get over that shit so what's the real reason??? We love rewards? After a long day of putting effort into every nook and cranny of our lives the last thing we want to do is try and eat well.  All I want to do is set on my couch, have a beer and something delicious and pass out.  Because I deserve it (?) Why do I deserve it again? Oh yeah because I work hard for everyone else all day and I want to do something for myself.  Why is destroying my body and my self esteem (getting fat) doing something for myself again? Oh its not.  Its ass backwards is what it is.  Its a poor habit that needs to change.  Because when you eat clean you are rewarding yourself everyday...yeah I said it.  Eating healthy is a reward because you are saying to yourself and the world "I AM WORTH A LITTLE WILLPOWER AND LITTLE EXTRA EFFORT."

It seems backwards.  Maybe it is.  Maybe its not how you feel.  Maybe you feel like eating well and saving your own life are not worth the extra ten minutes it takes to prepare a meal or the tiny willpower required to say no to alcohol/sugar/fat/delicious pizza.  So then look at it this way...save money, get skinny.  Satisfied?