Yesterday Dr. Phil said the difference between a goal and a dream was that a goal has a date and a plan. So yesterday I made two goals, two dates, and two plans...wrote them down and everything and decided to stick to them.
Last night I was talking to an old friend and she said something that broke my heart.
"Is it too late for me?"
She's 29 btw. And of course its never too late to start making changes. And that's all this really is, little changes and choices that add up to results.
So back to willpower. I was thinking about it. How much do you need to be successful at anything? How much discipline to make your dream a reality? I don't really know. I know I feel like I don't have a lot of it. But there is a difference between getting up everyday and battling yourself all the time to do the right thing and stressing over eating a piece of candy and beating yourself up over a french fry, and just writing out a game plan and doing it. That doesn't seem so hard now does it? Here are some steps to building willpower I have found really work for me and maybe they will for you too not just in diet and exercise but life as well:
1. STOP HATING YOURSELF
If you stand in front of the mirror everyday and hate what you see you are off to a bad start. Why do you hate yourself so much? You did it. Its your fault. But you can also fix it. And that is empowering, not deprecating. Look at yourself and don't hate it, but say out loud what you want to change. There are so many things in this world I hate and probably can't do a damn thing about, but when it comes to ANYTHING about myself, well I can change that, probably almost immediately. Standing there hating yourself is a waste of time. If you don't like something say you don't, then say what you're going to do about it. The chains that bind you are the ones you've made yourself, so break them and fix that shit.
2. ITS REALLY NOT THAT HARD
We are not battling the forces of darkness or trying to get the ring to rule them all back to Mordor. You are just not eating crap and getting off your ass and doing something. Its not hard. Quit telling yourself it is and that you will fail. Its not a quest for the missing grail, its just food. Just because you failed before doesn't mean you will this time. You can do it. You WILL do it. You are just following the plan. Get down off the cross and do some lunges.
3. STOP FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF
So you are unhappy? Join the club. But you are not different, and the millions of people who have come before you have done it so why can't you? You're not too old, you're not too fat, you DO have enough time, and you have the strength to do it because see #2 ITS NOT THAT HARD!
4. STOP MAKING EXCUSES
No one cares that you're fat. It doesn't bother the rest of the world. It keeps on turning right around doesn't it? So your excuses are only hurting you. And you will pay the price, no one else. So stop making them. You're wasting time. All that time you spend making an excuse you could have been making a solution. Sit down and make the goal, make the date, and make the plan.
5. CONGRATULATE YOURSELF
You are not a lazy piece of shit who can't do anything. You are a person on a mission. And everyday and every second that you get closer to the goal you need to praise yourself. Tell yourself you did it and you are going to do it again. Look in the mirror and say today I may not like what I see so today I'm going to change it. Today I will be better than I was yesterday. I will be better in the next minute than I was a minute ago. Pump yourself up. Rocky IV soundtrack will do the trick.
6. DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP
Rome wasn't built in a day. And your fat ass isn't going to be smaller in a week. And if you slip up don't beat yourself up over it. Move on. No pity parties here. Pity parties are not fun for anyone and the food and music are terrible. Just keep going. For every mistake do two good things to make up for it. Ferrero Roche? An extra 2 min on the treadmill and 15 extra pushups. Then smile and pat yourself on the back because you are doing it!
7. DONT HATE YOUR WORKOUT
If you don't want to get up at 5 am and do lunges then don't. Find something you like to do. Got kids? Go play with them. Got a dog? Go walk it. Park farthest from the door at kroger and walk. You should feel blessed you can even do that. Some people can't. The point is do something. 20 mins people. 20 min of MODERATE activity 4-5 times a week will do wonders. You don't have to kill yourself. But some days you might have the urge..and when you do take it and run with it.
I suggest you sit down right now, write your goal down in big fun letters. Then write down your date. Then make a plan for each week that brings you closer toward that goal. And banish all negativity from your life. Don't do ANYTHING that isn't pushing you towards that goal. Its not that hard.
